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My thumb where the wasp bit me has swollen now. I have a fat person's thumb.

Last night I had lamb cutlets for dinner and they were good. My Mum says I never like her cooking. I think that's untrue.

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I got stung by a wasp. Ooo. I was wondering what that felt like.

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I watched Be Cool today with David.

It wasn't very good. It lacked heart. It had some good music in it. The singer girl was cool and she did a duet with Aerosmith. Aerosmith a pretty cool in a "old school rockers" kinda way.

But the film itself was sad. The dialoge was wooden. It tried to be self-aware and funny, but in the end it was just pretty sad. Oh well, you win some, you loose some.

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I'm a Rocker


I've always wanted a mullet.

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Right now I'm listening to a sermon by John Stott. I might stop soon because it's hard to listen and type at the same time.

John Stott is one of my heros. I've never heard him preach before, it's kind of fun. His voice doesn't sound like I have imagined. But I like it anyway. He sounds like someone's grandfather. Like he should be in "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe".

I've been quiet a quiet blogger recently. I haven't been burdening you all with every minute detail of my life.

Last night I was preaching and my voice started to go a little raspy and I thought to myself, "Wow, I'm becoming a professional"

After church some of us went down to Dee Why for Chinese. It was a lovely relaxing way to end a Sunday. We laughed a lot and ate good food. It was one of those nice events where everyone at the table is someone you're enjoying being with.

After dinner David and I dropped Guin home and we got to see her and Phil's flat. It was quite the funness. It had a top quality view of the train yards and walls that looked like they had been painted by a middle aged woman with dyed red hair who wore dangly ear rings and gypsy skirts.

So there's a little bit of my life. Tomorrow I have off, but my options are rather limited seeing as I have run out of money. I'll just have to be inventive. Perhaps I'll run a garage sale.

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Sometimes the world doesn't change enough to keep me interested.

You sit around thinking "When is something big going to happen? I'm feeling rather bored." And something big does happen, planes fly into buildings, waves wipe out islands, and that keeps you depressed and interested for a few days and then you're thinking "Boring, I'm over this disaster."

I wonder if I'd get bored if I was famous.

Actually I don't feel bored often, I think I'm just not often in a state of over-interest or hyper-awareness. (Maybe hyper-awareness isn't the word but it sounds good)

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I'm at the Fusion office right now. I'm not sure how I ended up here. I guess I'm just trying to fit in with the workers here. I'm typing and pretending to type important things in solidarity with my youth worker brothers and sisters here.

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Good Friday Song

I thought this might be an appropriate song for today. Although U2 are always appropriate. I appologise for their language.

"Wake Up Dead Man" - U2

Jesus, Jesus help me
I'm alone in this world
And a f***** up world it is too
Tell me, tell me the story
The one about eternity
And the way it's all gonna be

Wake up, wake up dead man
Wake up, wake up dead man

Jesus, I'm waiting here boss
I know you're looking out for us
But maybe your hands aren't free
Your father, he made the world in seven
He's in charge of Heaven
Will you put a word in for me

Wake up, wake up dead man
Wake up, wake up dead man

Listen to the words, they'll tell you what to do
Listen over the rythm that's confusing you
Listen to the reed in the saxaphone
Listen over the hum of the radio
Listen over sounds of blades in rotation
Listen through the traffic and circulation
Listen as hope and peace try to rhyme
Listen over marching bands playing out their time

Wake up, wake up dead man
Wake up, wake up dead man

Jesus, were you just around the corner
Did you think to try and warn her
Or are you working on something new
Is there an order in all of this disorder
Is it like a tape recorder
Can we rewind it just once more

Wake up, wake up dead man
Wake up, wake up dead man
Wake up, wake up dead man

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Serena Williams talking about her sister and herself:

"Growing up, I would have loved to have had such a positive role model to look up to and try to be like and try to emulate. We love having that opportunity to say, 'Look, you can be like us, you can be successful and at the same time have high morals and high self-esteem and be a very nice person at the end of the day'."

If only I could have known them when I was young.

From here.

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Sometimes I laugh at my own jokes.

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Today Liam told me that Gavin DeGraw is "White Girl Music". I resent that. It's probably true, but I'd rather not think that I listen to "White Girl Music".

Please no-one point out that I also listen to John Mayer and Norah Jones.

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I have a crush

I have a crush on Norah Jones. Oh, so much.

I shouldn't have gone to see her last night, she was great, she's made my heart go all "pitter-patter". She's got a fantastic voice, she's a friendly person, and she's great. Every time someone in the audience shouted something at her like "You rock Norah!" or "I love you Norah!" she'd acknowledge it. And if she didn't understand what they said she'd ask them to repeat it. How cool is that? I smile and nod with an audience of one, she asks for clarification with an audience of 10,000.

And she made such good music, her and her handsome band. It was tops. Yay for Norah.

I think I was one of the few men there who wasn't dragged along by their wife or girlfriend and I think Jem and I were one of the few groups of people under the age of 35. But regardless of our oddness, Norah was cool.

3/22/2005 03:46:00 pm


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CityRail has an amazing ability to make time stand still. I've been sitting here at Strathfield Station for the past 20 minutes and my train has been leaving in 13 minutes the whole time. It's fantastic!

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I'm going to see Norah Jones tonight.

I did an Easter talk at a primary school this morning. I'll do another one tomorrow and another one the day after that. It's amazing how easy it is to make kids laugh. Just say "Vomit" and off they go.

After the assembly I was talking to a lady and her baby fell out of its pram. That made conversation decidedly more awkward after that.

So much is happening at the moment, I don't have time to blog it all. I leave at 7am and get home at 2am. At least it feels a little like that.

I'm living back at home now. I moved home on Friday night. Robert informed me while sitting in the kitchen that my family had gone to Canberra and Mum wanted us to move home.

Saturday I spent in Nowra making REC happen. At least making the video side of things happen. Howie and I rocked up at around 12, patched in (I'm not sure if that's the right term, but it sounds good) and we were done. We were doing a live mix with 3 cameras and a dvd player. Usually that takes about 6 hours to set up. This time it took us about 1 because most things had been done for us. It was great. We had free time to go explore Nowra. I think Nowra's one form of entertainment on a Saturday afternoon is riding bikes from one end of the street to the other. It was a little depressing. They should move to the city.

The night was good. The concert was about 3 and a half hours long. It was hard work but good fun. Jimmy played good with his band. Revive played well. I think they really do get better every time I see them.

Sunday was Sunday. Mostly essay writing. Yesterday was rather boring. I have a six week holiday from Greek now. I am unsure whether to take the break and enjoy it, or work my butt off and become a Greek-Freak. I'll probably take the first option by default.

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I meant to get up at 8:30am this morning. I got up at 11:30. I'm not sure if I slept through my alarm or I didn't set it properly last night. Either way, the world hasn't really worked all that bad as a result. I just got more sleep and missed 2 hours of lectures that I wasn't planning on going to anyway. Tops.

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Essay finished. I'm off to bed.

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I'm home from church in record time (I've been home for about half an hour) because I'm here to write and essay. David has kindly lent me a monitor to use while I get "The Beast" fixed. Now I have a fat essay to write.

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Because it might be fun

I know that it's becoming the latest craze. And people might not do my questions because I'm a blatant rip-off (like how no one is watching Starstruck after Idol) but I'll give it a go anyway.

Comment on these if you read my blog (I assume you won't be able to if you don't read my blog)...

Why you read my blog:
How long you've been reading for:
Where you first met me (if you have):
First Television Character you had a crush on (apart from me):

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I'm at college at the moment doing research for my essay. It's not exciting, I'm looking forward to going home. I don't know when I'll be finished though. I got distracted by a book of feminist essays about Genesis. It wasn't as interesting as I hoped it would be.

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Between Now and April 3rd...

I have a little to do. I'm wondering how I maganged for this to happen, but I have somehow managed to find myself with lots to do. Between now and April 3rd I have to:

Write a talk for an ISCF group
Give a talk at an ISCF group
Write an Easter talk for a primary school
Give an Easter talk four times in 3 different primary schools
Write a 2,250 word essay and hand it in
Peform in a Puppet Play 3 times
Film a conert in Nowra
Run a small group
Run a messy night for the youth group
Write 3 scenes for the new Breakthru' Project
Find out about campsites to film at
Go to an Audition for Breakthru' Artz
Write a sermon on the Resurrection
Give a sermon on the Resurrection
Adapt a sermon on Community
Give a sermon on Community
Go to a wedding
Watch Norah Jones in Concert
Go to a Buck's Night
Go to a Wedding
Have 2 days off

I think that could be it. I'm not really all that worried about it, although I probably should be.

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It's a little like that at the moment. Nothing terrible but just an overwhelming urge to spend most of my life lying on the floor. A carpeted floor though, because without carpet it's not very comfortable. But a floor is where I would like to spend a few hours, maybe a day or two.

I had a really good scripture lesson today. I only had 9 kids and we spent most of the time sitting in a circle and talking about why Jesus died and rose again. It was great. It was the kind of lesson I'd love to have every week. But alas, I'm not that talented.

I'm going to the Tavern tonight to eat steak and drink beer. This is the Young Adults Male Small Group. Yeah, that's what Bible Studies should be like every week. Of course we won't study much Bible, but steak is fun.

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This story about the Guy in Atlanta who killed a few people in a court house, then held a woman hostage in her appartment for a few hours is really interesting. It may be the first time The Purpose Driven Life has been read in a hostage situation.

This story is so good I'm sure it'll get made into cheesy tele-movie for the Hallmark Channel (Hey, since when did a card manufacturer get the qualifications to make televison?)

Anyway, I liked the story. I wonder if this woman will become a Christian celebrity. She sounds pretty cool.

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I arrived at college today to do my work in the library. As soon as I got there I pulled out my phone to message someone and say "I'm bored" when I realised that it was silly telling someone that I was bored before I had even done anything that was able to be deemed boring. With this revelation in mind I went to the computers and checked my emails.

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A Weekend Unlike Any Other
Except perhaps those which are similar

I slept in this morning which was absolutely tops. I dreamt about having to wake up, but to my great delight when I actually did wake up, I realised that I hadn?t woken up before. It was brilliant. And now I'm just spending the morning bumming around before I head off to college to do some library work. And Greek, yuck.

Anyway I think I was going to make this post about my weekend.


I woke up bright and early at around 7am. I was going whitewater rafting.

The next hour or so was pretty stupid. I drove to my house to collect my things out of my dust filled, internally metamorphosing house. I went in and got my shoes, locked the door, got to the car and remembered I needed a t-shirt. I went back in got a shirt, went back to the car, took my t-shirt off, realised I'd forgotten a towel, went back in while putting my new t-shirt and got a towel. Once I had all that, I the proceeded to attempt to reverse down the driveway. I have done this hundreds of times before but suddenly forgot how to do it and spent the next few minutes helplessly going backwards and forwards at the top of my driveway hoping that the neighbours weren't watching.

Once I had left, I drove off to a house to pick up two girls I had never met before. I thought I had, which is why I offered to give them a lift, but it turned out when I picked them up that I had no idea who they were. Oh well, I'm generally in the habit of picking up random women, so that's ok.

Once we got to Penrith, a car trip of awkward conversation later, we met the others for our artificial extreme sports adventure.

There were eight of us, and after we had endured a safety session with about 30 big, noisy men on a buck's party, we were put in our raft with our instructor "Crunchy". We were taught how to obey his commands (paddle forwards, paddle back, lean left, lean right, get down, on the job) then we paddled onto a conveyor belt which took us up to the top of the course.

The rafting course (as used in the Sydney 2000 Olympics) is very short. Probably about 200 meters circular. But it was fun. There were lots of waves and fast flowing water. We went round the course about five times, trying it different ways. On the last round we pulled off to the side, dumped our paddles and took our boat back to the bottom of a large waterfall/swell/gush thing (I have no idea what the technical names are) and our instructor seemed to be determined to get us to capsize and avoid capsizing the boat at the same time. I enjoyed that, I felt like was on the set of the movie The River Wild (which I'm not really sure why that film has lingered so well in my memory). I fell out at one stage. I grabbed on to the boat and tried to haul myself in. Helen and whoever was next to her, pulled me back in using their newly learnt rapids rescue abilities. It was my favourite part of the adventure, it was like a movie ("Don't let go Tom! We've got you!" "I'm trying! I'm trying!" "If you go, I go too!" No one said that but it would have been cool if they did).

Once we were finished we were sent off to get changed. When greeted by a change room full of big naked men on a buck's party, I was a little perturbed. I think I managed to maintain my dignity though. I wonder if I shared similar feelings with the stripper who would probably visit those men later that night.

Once lunch was done, I drove my two new boating buddies home and there was much less awkward conversation. It's amazing what a near-real, pseudo-dangerous, life threatening situation can do to build camaraderie.

Once back at my temporary home I had a sleep.

I woke up and headed off to Starbucks for a meeting about this year's major Breakthru' production. It was a fun meeting, and I was happy to be in a meeting where I wasn't talking about youth ministry. Creative stuff is a nice change.

At night, after bumming around and watching a bit of John Mayer on DVD, Howie and I headed off to the city to see The Dawn Collective's EP launch. Getting on the train at St Leonard's I realised it was a Saturday night when I walked downstairs and entered the "Valley of Cleavage". I had to catch a train full of people off to clubs talking about manicures and fake tan. It was an horrificly boring eavesdropping situation.

At the door of the Metro the bouncers checked my ID and stamped my arm. It was again fun to feel the thrill of being over 18. It's only happening for four years.

In the darkened room that was the "space" for the launch, I met some people I knew. "Hello" "Hello". There was a band playing who I had never heard of but were interesting. They seemed to be an odd mix of talented musicians who still seemed to be writing music for their HSC major work. I liked them most of the time though.

More people who I knew arrived and I said "Hello" "Hello" some more. The Dawn Collective played. It was the first time I had seen them and they did good. I had been told they were arty, so I was little worried, but they weren't silly, inaccessible, vibey arty. I heard someone say they were very tight (I'm assuming they were talking about their musicianship) and I decided to adopt that as an adjective to make me sound musically smart. Anyway I liked them, they made me want to be able to play music and that, for me, is always the sign of a good band.

Howie, Sal and I Nightrider-ed it home. Waiting at Town Hall for at bus at midnight is always an interesting anthropological experience. Lots of girls in little skirts, drunk sleazy men who I wouldn't want my daughter marrying, cops, hotted up cars playing the music that is playing in the clubs they're driving to (I'm guessing the car trip there is a like a warm up) and the odd middle aged couple who seem to have gotten lost on their way home from whatever restaurant they were out at with their middle aged friends.

I went to bed around 1:40ish.


I woke up dull and early at 8am. I had a shower and despised the world a little less.

There wasn't really much to Sunday that was unusual. I got to sit in the morning service and do nothing. That was nice. Stephen preached about the end of the world. That was nice.

I didn't have any lunch friends so I mooched around the office and planned the teaching for youth group in the afternoon. I also managed to have a nap and write lots of appointments into my Outlook calender. Tim and I hung out and he gave me some strawberry YoGo.

During youth group we played a game of Stomp. I think I got my first ministry black eye yesterday. Trying to stomp on each other's feet me and a girl both jumped at each other at the same time. We collided. She kneed me in the leg and I headbutted her with my ear in the eye. She retired hurt to get ice on her eye. I felt bad, and the rest of the afternoon was filled with jokes about what a bad person I am.

Church was good. I was completely zoned out by the end. I couldn't think straight and I was looking forward to going home. After Maccas I drove to Coles and stocked up on food that's bad for me. I came home, drank Coke, and ate Janet's dinner, microwaved food and Milo chocolate moose. Howie and I stayed up late talking. I went to bed and slept in. It was great.

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I get to sleep in tomorrow.

That'll suit me just fine.

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There's no one home yet. Everyone is still out. Maybe my family has moved back home without telling me.

Oh well. I'm watching a silly baseball movie. Then I'll go to bed.

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I was thinking about my blog this morning as I brushed my teeth. I can't remember what. I do remember that it had something to do with the fact that I have people who read my blog from different parts of the world. US and Canada mainly. And then I thought I should say "Hi" to my non-Australian readers.

"Hello people who aren't Australian! What's your national dish?"

"Hello North Americans! How's the northern hemisphere?"

That was a "Hi" and a question. I love Americans (Canadians too, but I think they're a little more like Australians, so I'm not so interested). I'm interested in yellow school buses, presidents and thinking Abraham Lincon is wonderful (not that he isn't). I'm interested in Southern Baptists, news programs that make every news event an "Event!" and being in the centre of a cultural empire. I'm interested in high gun ownership, fat people (is everyone there actually fat?) and Hollywood. I think I want to live in America one day. I want to live in the centre of the world. And I reckon people'd dig my accent.

And then I thought, just to be culturally exclusive I could make a reference to something Australian that people from overseas wouldn't understand. I could feel elitist and that would be fun and give me a sense of identity.

Big Kev

That was a little of an anti-climax. Perhaps I should try again...

Tony Abbott and his magical son

That's a little better. Maybe one more try...


Hmmm. I could be onto a winner with that one.

I think I've had enough now. And since I've wasted so much time pissing about on my blog, I think I've run out of time to go find a friend. I have to get up early in the morning I'm going white water rafting out at Penrith.

I might go hire a DVD.

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Today's theological discussion questions for the office were:

1. Since we all deserve judgment, should a lack of suffering be viewed as an example of God's mercy rather than considering the suffering of innocent people an example of God's unjustified judgment?*

2. Is the whole of the Old Testament an outworking of Genesis 3:15?

Theology discussions in the Church Centre are getting better because people don't seem to agree with each other as readily these days. There's usually a consensus in the end though.

*It was something like that.

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I've just arrived home and there's no one here. I'm trying to decide if I should go out and find a friend. My mother isn't here to tell me I don't have any friends so I might be ok.

In other news I've been thinking about vulnerability lately. I don't like it. It makes you feel like an idiot. It's probably useful though.

I've been listening to my new Gavin DeGraw cds (2 of them) today. Yeah, fun. I love the two play day.

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Rob Thomas has gone Boy-Pop

I just listened to Rob Thomas' new single Lonely No More for the first time. His first solo once since Matchbox 20 and it's Boy-Pop. He's following in the footsteps of Justin, Ricky and all your favourite Nova and 2-Day boys.

I don't like the new music, I don't like the new haircut, I want the rock. The problem is, the music's in my head. I may have to buy the album. But I don't want to.

He is Rob Thomas though, so he deserves respect, even if he has gone soft.

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"Henry was alone in the house one morning before work late in November. It was raining outside. Even though he had four rooms-virtually a wing of his own-he liked to have the entire house to himself. He could scream if he wanted to and no one would be appalled; he could shout, intrude, explore, laugh or cry and no one would know. Usually he just made himself a cup of coffee and wondered where the others were."

Sean Condon - Film

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I'm waiting for the mail to come because I think there will be a CD or 2 inside a box inside the box. I'm quite excited.

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I taught a really dodgy scripture lesson today. The kids are already misbehaving for me and I'm on week two. I need to grow an iron fist. Or a better puppy dog face to make them feel bad.

I had to teach them to sing a song today and they all laughed at me because I didn't know the words. Oh the embarrassment of being laughed at by a bunch of 11 year-olds.

Last night I watched Hitch. That was fun. I like romantic comedies. And I was pleased that this time it was the chick who stuffed up more. I may be wrong, but in romantic comedies I get the feeling that, when it comes time for one of them to do the wrong thing and supposedly end the relationship it's more often the guy. And then he has to say "No, I didn't mean that, I love you!" and they kiss. This time it was the girl who stuffed up. And then the guy. But the girl first. I'm all about equality and I reckon chicks should stuff up relationships just as much as guys.

In the film one of the women, when trying to find out about a man said she'd "Google him". If anyone tries to Google me, they'll get heaps of stuff. Mostly just me talking about me and a few stupid photos, but what more could you want, eh?

When I'm big and famous (as in fat and notorious) there'll be whole fan sites dedicated to me. Like "The Unofficial Tom French Page of Love" and stuff like that.

Right now I'm at work. I've finished my work for the day and I'm procrastinating doing my Greek so I'm blogging.

I've decided that if I want more friends at my college I should become a lecturer there. Or perhaps write a book. At the moment I'm kind of a nobody. I did find out when my assessment is due. That's both a relief and a stress. It was one of those cases where ignorance wasn't bliss, but neither is knowing.

Kinda like when you get a pain in your head and it turns out to be a cancer.

I wonder how much damage mobile phones are doing to our brains. Nobody talks about that anymore. Did they stop microwaving our minds or did we just get bored of hearing about it.

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It's very difficult to find anything on the internet about "Islands where people change gender" I've discovered that today.

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At my college there is an "Internet Cafe" that has two computers, hundreds of pigeon holes and some assignment drop boxes. I think that it could more aptly be called a "Pigeon Hole Cafe" because an Internet Cafe with only two computers is pretty lame.

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Holy Grail

And I've followed orders
God knows where I've been
But I woke up alone
All my wounds were clean
I'm still here
I'm still a fool for the holy grail - Hunters and Collectors

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Bono the Banker

Bono has been suggested as a potential candiate as the Head of the World Bank. That'd be cool.

I read it here.

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I just arrived home to pick up some stuff before I go to Janet's for the next week or two. My whole downstairs is bare. There is nothing there for the renovations. I feel like we're moving house. My childhood is leaving me. How sad.

I'll be back soon though, with a new and improved house. And my bedroom is staying the same.

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Ryan once asked me if I would want to go out with a girl who wanted to go out with me. If you like a person that's good, but if they like you back, then there must be something wrong with them because you know what you're like. It's a really sad way of looking at things, but it's interesting. I've been thinking a little about it lately because I got the Icehouse song stuck in my head, and I realised it fitted with what Ryan was talking about. I don't think Ryan really believed what he was saying too much. Or I hope not, if I was a girl I'd go out with Ryan. Or at least, I'd certainly put him high on my list of good people to go out with.

I think I told Ryan that I'd go out with the girl and let her figure out for herself that I wasn't worth going out with.

"Well, you've gotta be crazy, baby
to want a guy like me
Yeah, you've gotta be out of your mind
- Icehouse

Of course being the most beautiful man in the world this is all purely hypothetical...

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It's a Saturday night and I've spent it at home. I told Mum I might go out tonight to see a movie or something. She kept saying "With who? I don't think you'll find many people." I think she thinks I don't have any friends. In the end I asked one person if they wanted to see a movie with me, they said "No" so I gave up and decided that my mum was probably right. I watched a dvd with Dad. At least if I have no friends I still have my Dad.

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I tried to take my small group to mini-golf last night but it rained. I think that's the 3rd time we've tried going to mini-golf and it has rained. Grr. I'm never going to play putt putt again.

We ended up watching a dvd and getting pizza. Oh well. Not very interesting but what can you do at the last minute?

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I came home tonight and found that my big, fat, expensive, 19 inch monitor has decided to go fuzzy. I'm wondering if it overheated (I left it on today, and the screensaver didn't kick in) or if it just decided to go to the dogs. I'm hoping it fixes itself because I don't really want to buy another monitor. But, well, it's only money.

I have been a really bad college attender this week. I have only been to 1 out of 3 classes this week. I wagged Greek to watch the Academy Awards and tonight I only turned up to hand my assignment in because I felt like I could better spend my time recovering from my cold for Scripture Seminars tomorrow. I might try and get to sleep reasonably early tonight. I hope I'll be able to sleep.

Today I went to Mitch's house and ate 4 burritos. I also made lots of phone calls and drove all over Sydney.

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Photo Experiment

I have named the below photo nude woman.jpg to see if I get lots of hits from people looking for nude women. That'd be funny.

Then again, I might make people angry. They'll be like "Hey, where's my nude woman!?! Stupid Christians!"

If you have Net Nanny you won't be able to see this picture. Cool.

Nude Woman.jpg

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Previously Unreleased Photo of Howie and Tom

At the Wedding.jpg

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Some days I have this desire to blog something profound. Or blog some feelings, get stuff off my chest. But most of the time I don't. I think because I realise there are some things best left off blogs.

Right now I don't have any money. I think my Mum owes me $8.70. As well as $2,190. But I owe them $600 or something. So it all evens out. I should get paid sometime soon. That's always an exciting and depressing day. I wonder if I have a phone bill that I haven't paid yet.

I got a new toothbrush today. It has a tongue cleaner on it. Weird.

I might be preaching a three week series in church this year. I have been thinking about making a series of 3 short videos to go with it. That'd be fun.

I've also been thinking about The Donny Jaffa Show for this year. I really should get moving on that. Too much to do. But it's all fun.

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Canoes and Oscars


I said I’d blog more later so I guess here I am.

May I just say now, every time I watch the Oscars I remember how often they have let me down. Like the year that Titanic won everything, Bah! And I was reminded tonight of Shakespeare In Love winning. What was with that? And the Life is Beautiful guy for winning Best Actor. There’s many a time that the Oscars have let me down. The year Shakespeare In Love won I ran around the building shouting in anger.

But they have done good. They finally decided to remember Lord of the Rings last year. 11 awards. Thank you.

As I was saying, I went canoeing on the weekend. I went with a bunch of the young adult men from church. I had to get up way early (6am) and drive back to work. I had been there till 11pm the night before writing a report for the Annual Vestry Meeting so I wasn’t overly enthusiastic to be heading back. But alas there I was.

We loaded up our cars and headed off. Driving down into Kangaroo Valley (where we were canoeing) was the most stressful driving experience of my life. There was a bike race on with about 1,200 riders along the same road we were driving. They were going our direction. To make matters worse a heavy fog had arrived and visability was down to about 10 meters. Cyclists would just appear out of nowhere and suddenly you had to avoid them. Cars would do the same thing so overtaking a cyclist was always worrying that you were going to have a head on collision. I only had one moment where I was a little close to having a head on. And I was pleased to discover I didn’t swear.

Driving the fog was great though. That’s not a joke, as well as being stressful, I was having a wonderful time. Driving is never that difficult and never that risky, I loved the challenge. It made arriving safely at the end much more worthwhile.

Once we got to the canoeing hire place (after a little bit of getting lost) we put all our gear in 55-litre barrels, loaded ourselves onto a bus and headed to the river.

At the river we paired up, got in our canoes and on to the river, then things got a little worrying. About 10 minutes into the paddle my arms and shoulders were killing me. They were burning like I hadn’t used them in years. I didn’t say much but I got worried that I wasn’t going to be able to finish the paddle. But an hour in I was feeling fine. For some reason the first kilometre or so was the hardest. After that it was tiring, but rhythmic. Nothing stressful.

I was paddling with Dieter. He’s a good man. I got to hear a bit of his life story and talk about life. He was a very reliable partner.

About 2 and half hours after leaving we arrived at the end of our estimated 4 hour canoe trip. It was a little disappointing. I realised we’d just paddled 14 kms in almost half time. If we kept paddling we could have finished the trip and been home by 9pm. But we didn’t, we stopped set up camp, collected firewood, dug a toilet then went swimming.

That night the coldest thing to drink was the beer so we all drank beer. It was very blokey all standing around the fire drinking beer. The night consisted of many a juvenile joke and a throwing anything we could into the fire to see if it would burn. I think people’s caricatures of men are probably pretty accurate. Women may not spend their whole time sitting around talking about shopping doing craft, cooking and cleaning, but men sit around making fart jokes, drinking beer and burning stuff.

When it started raining we went to bed. I shared a ¾ man tent (billed as a 2 man tent) with Stephen. It was very stuffy, very intimate, and not real pleasant. I had a big cramp in my left arm which wouldn’t let me sleep comfortably. At one stage of the night I stretched and managed to rest my elbow on Stephen’s face. I couldn’t work out what that warm thing that was under my elbow was. Funny how you forget you’re in a tent.

The next day was a short paddle. I shared a canoe with Matt this time. We discussed rude jokes, our lives, romanticism, creative productions and idealism vs pragmatism. It was a very productive paddle.

At our end point we muck around a bit. Actually most of the guys mucked around and I stood on the edge took a few photos and had a chuckle. I was content there.

Once all was packed up and we'd gotten back to the base (via a rather hairy bust trip) we drove home. I got lost going home again and I got back to youth group an hour late. That was a little dodgy but in the end I got to see the people at the retirement village and that’s always fun.

When I got to go to bed that night I was pretty happy.


I had an Oscars party last night because I love the Oscars. It was bigger than last year I had managed to send out an email a whole 20 hours before the event. I had Jem and Sal, then Gemma, Anmol and Hayley. Howie joined us right at the end.

I’m pretty happy with the way the awards turned out. There was nothing horrendous that won. That Believe song from The Polar Express was horridly sappy trite (Believe in what you feel inside...give your dreams the wings to fly) and Counting Crows did a pretty awful rendition of Accidentally in Love. The Myer ads were quite stupid but not history-makingly so. Chris Rock failed to annoy me as much as usual. Clint Eastwood is just the best. I wanna be like him when I’m old. I won’t be, but it’d be cool. We saw a lot of Johnny Depp, Warren Beatty, Oprah and the black guy with see-through glasses frames, but they didn’t really do anything. Natalie Portman should have won an award for being Natalie, not because she did better in Closer than Cate did in The Aviator. I’m glad Million Dollar Baby won, I liked that film.

That’s my Oscars wrap up.