Friday 1 July 2005

Donny's Done for the Year

Well tonight was another wonderful Marrickville Air Guitar experience.

For those you who want to know the score, Donny didn't get a place. But no one's crying over here.

Tonight I decided that before I was performing, I didn't want to get changed in the toilets. There were rather gross. It's always a tricky act trying to get changed while keeping the clothes you aren't wearing out of the urine and fecal matter. This time I was going to go into the change rooms. The main attraction for me was that, seeing as Marrickville is the premiere adult entertainment venue of the inner West, I would be getting changed in the strippers' change rooms. There were no strippers in the room tonight. In fact there were no strippers at the club tonight happily, but at least I can notch that one down on the list of things that I have done.

The change room was a very interesting place though. I think that everyone who went into the air guitar competition was either a very confident extrovert or rather weird, or both. This meant that the change room was full of wonderful people and most of them seemed to be wearing KISS make up.

There was one girl who started chatting to me. I'm not sure if she was just chatty or she was chatting me up. I would like to think that see was chatting me up. After all see had seen me without a shirt and in my boxers. We talked about her family, our shared heritage, adoption, film festivals, karaoke, and lots more, which is a rather odd experience when your surrounded by half-naked men wearing make up. She even took a photo of me and sang to me.

Later in the club she came up to me again and introduced herself to me, and I accidentally barred her because I was watching the other Air Guitarists. I felt rather bad about that. When I realised what I had done I couldn't find her to apologise. I'm sure she was thinking "You're friendly in the change rooms, but as soon as we get into the club you treat me like I'm a no-body."

Anyway, Donny's performance went well I think. He did everything right. The music that Jimmy made for the occasion was great, I got to climb the pole (all the way to the roof), I smashed my guitar and I almost got my timing right. What more can you ask? Oh and I had fun.

But there were other people who were better then me. There was a girl who was a trained pole dancer who probably destroyed her guitar doing extraordinary pole things but got way up on points because girls dancing on poles get high marks.

There was another man who dressed as a woman. And there was a man who wore a suit with the back cut out of it exposing his bare bum to us all.

It really was quite eventful.

In the end Donny didn't win any of the places. But I'm glad I did it. It was certainly an experience and I can now say that I've danced on a real pole dancing pole and gotten changed (and chatted up) in a strippers' dressing room.

I doubt I'll be entering any more Air Guitar Competitions again though. I'll have to get my thrills elsewhere.

I would be willing to say that we probably won't see Donny again at least until next April, and what a relief that will be.

Rock On!

For those of you who are getting worried I don't endorse strip clubs, pole dancing, or other forms of adult entertainment (except perhaps bingo, gardening and other activities like that). And you won't find me at Marrickville RSL on a Friday and Saturday when the real adult entertainment happens. Just thought I should clear that up.

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